No more "Day Ones"

I am so done with having "day ones". I am tired of staring over. My "One Year 100 Pounds" officially started yesterday, and I made it through my last day one! I read something this morning that stuck in my head all day. "Be awesome today, repeat tomorrow". I just need to get through one day at a time and stop giving up. I am ready to get past this weight thing and finally be the fit and active person I so want to be. I am ready. I AM READY TO BE AWESOME, AND REPEAT TOMORROW!!

These little girls deserce a healthy mommy....

One year 100 pounds - 1/365

My time is now.

Every day passes and I tell myself that "I will start tomorrow" or "This is the last time I am going.to binge". But I never do and it never is. I am tired of lying to myself and letting my precious time slip away and be wasted on an unhealthy life. I am so ready to be the healthy woman, wife and mother that I am destined to be. I am motivated and empowered. I am able to do this. I am not crippled. I am blessed with so many wonderful things in my life and it is time for me to affirm them by being the healthiest I can be and live my life enjoying those blessings for a long time to come.

I plan on accomplishing this by blogging daily for the next 365 days. I am going to fully document my journey of losing at least 100 pounds in the next year. I have so many resources available to help me accomplish this including a supportive family, my gym, and my blog. I plan on not giving up, so I hope you will join me on this ride...

God bless me on my journey and please pray for me. This is the hardest and most rewarding thing I have ever done in my life, but I am ready. I am ready for this change. Thank you for supporting me.... Here I go!!!!

Just say no...

I just say no to eating after 7 pm...
It's my new thing...
And guess what... I haven't binged in 3 days....
I think I am on to something.....

I have a confession to make. I have a little problem with binging after dinner. I feel the need for something sweet around 8 or 9 at night and that used to end up with a late night run for ice dream or Oreo cookies from the grocery store down the street. Sometimes hubby came home with both. Most often I all within 24 hours. Uh huh.... Bad, I know..

When I work it is worse. All the food lying around was like a junk food buffet... bags of M&Ms, chips, twizzlers, cakes, muffins.... It really is no wonder nurses are heavy... family members are CONSTANTLY bring in donuts to show their appreciation....
How about a bag of apples once and a while people... just a thought....
Sneaking snack after snack, unable to control myself, it was an every night occurrence. This is bad too, I know... Just wait....

After work was even worse than that. I had no boundaries. If it was sweet or salty, I binged on it. Usually alone, in front of the computer. It was a way to decompress from a stressful night at work or an emotionally draining shift. It just felt good to be that full. Some nights it was the only thing I looked forward to when you have a terrible shift... Just going home and doing nothing, and eating until I couldn't eat anymore. Slipping into a food coma was the norm. Not any more.

Now I make one decision. One simple, black and white boundary that I don't cross. No food after 7pm. Why didn't I think of this sooner? Instead of a hundred food choices that I have to find the strength to make the right choice, most of which I am mentally unable to choose the healthy option, now I make one choice. Clear cut. No food after 7. Plain and simple. I eat dinner before 7, I don't binge after 7. This is now rule #1 to my new healthy eating lifestyle. I can already tell this is going to be one that I am going to be able to stick with.

Just keep blogging, Just keep blogging...

I have to ask myself, how many times am I going to start over? How many fresh starts can one person make? And why do I always feel the need to go back to square one?

A dear friend of mine keeps telling me to drop the "all or nothing" mentality and I think I am starting to finally see what she has been trying to tell me. I have this little habit of being extremly rigid and hard on myself, and then when I fail, even in the slightest, I reverse directions 180 degrees and punish myself.

So... Not... Healthy...

This last time I was down 8 pounds in one week and then had a 0.4 pound gain the next week. Instead of moving forward and being poud of the 7.6 pounds I still had lost... I binged, for about 2 months... And gained 16 pounds. It's seems so crazy when I write it out here but in my mind I was a failure and I let my poor self confidence and negative internal voice destroy my motivation and momentum.

 I really cannot explain why I do this to myself, every time... It wears on a person. I wait until I find the motivation and self confidence again to start over, to have another "fresh start".

Why try at all?

It's exhausting..  

And then I see my 2 beautiful daughters....

And I remember. I remember why I am here, and why I need to be here for a very long time. I believe the key here is how clear I can see things when I write. I write for me. When I write I understand. When I understand I succeed.

Please pray for me as I take on a new challenge that I WILL be blogging about, as frequently as I am able. More to come tomorrow...

Just keep blogging Emily...

Morning Motivation - 6/18/12

Good morning everyone! Today is day 5 since my fresh start and I feel great! I have found a few things that have really been working for me and I can't wait to share them all with you! One of them is getting a hefty dose of morning motivation and writing them down into my motivational journal.

I have been cruising all around Pinterest  and finding sayings an quotes that really inspire my to live my best life every day. The rubber ducky quote really says it all. When I am jazzed up and motivated in the morning I really feel like nothing can get in my way. I am filled with hope and faith that I can make it through the day, not binge on food and commit to my new healthy lifestyle. I am hoping to share a favorite quote daily so check back often! I would enjoy hearing your favorite motivational quotes or sayings as well! What gets you on the path for success daily? See you tomorrow!
-Emily